This bloke walked into a bar

I’m looking in the mirror and what do I see

Something rather horrible looking back at me.

Well, that’s what a week of eating four meals a day in a ‘dry’ regime does for you. This being offshore malarkey is all very well but it does have its drawbacks too. The ‘unhealthy’ regime for a start.

Now I’m well aware that the food thing is all about self discipline and common sense and that there’s a well equipped gym on board…………………but………………’s just not the same as being at home and all that that provides. For a start in Westbrook you can have an aerobic cycle ride along the prom without 20 tattooed Hartlepool scaffolders mouthing ‘fat wanker’ at your feeble efforts on the bike machine, or the twenty something genius project engineer, patronizing you with ‘slow down old man, we don’t want a stroke victim here’. It’s all too much for a sensitive thing like allatsea, it really is.

On the plus side, the weather, and more importantly the predicted vessel motions are looking positive for a start later today. Come the first day of September and this giant of a mutha is set to be departing field and preparing for its next job, deep down the line in the sunny south. Offshore Angola. That said, we’d better get a shift here then, and get done sharpish.



RFA Tidereach, summer 1977. Allatsea and other members of the 8-12 at around 0300.

About allatsea

Sixty year old master-mariner. Absolutely gorgeous. Well wedged.....when compared to a Nairobi street urchin. Sorted, in that I haven't been in court recently. Hopelessly optimistic, terminally disappointed. Good with cats and other fluffy things. No musical talent. Generous to a fault provided it's someone else's round. Political centreist with far right and left viewpoints. A green activist from the hydrocarbon position with nuclear leanings. Averse to avarice but always happy to receive lottery wins, gifts, windfalls, legacies, prizes and wet sloppy kisses.
This entry was posted in Maritime. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s